Modern people use all kinds of online video chats and applications for video communication everywhere – for work, studies or just for fun. When communicating with a familiar person via video, difficulties usually do not arise, but in case of chat roulettes, the situation is completely different. There is a stranger whom you see for the first time in your life. Finding a common language with him or her and overcoming your own anxiety is not such an easy task.
How can you get rid of the embarrassment when communicating in video chat with strangers and is it possible at all? We will tell you now!
7 practical tips to help you become more confident
Even if you are absolutely confident in yourself and in your own communication skills, some of our recommendations may be useful to you. Therefore, we advise you to review them.
1. Solve all “technical” issues. Check if your webcam and microphone are working, if they are properly positioned, if you are correctly positioned in the frame. Also pay attention to the background. Perhaps, you need to remove clutter and put things neatly in order not to embarrass the interlocutor. In general, firstly make sure that you can be heard and seen well, and then take care of everything else.
2. Start small. There is no need to try to pretend to be a master of public speaking. Imagine that this is just a friend you haven’t seen for a long time. Speak calmly, and bring up general topics that can be developed into a longer conversation. Do not talk about boring things, though. It is better to forget once and for all the standard questions like “What do you think of the weather?” and “How are you?”
3. Try to banish anxious thoughts before starting random video chat. A person is inclined to wind himself up. Many people even before the beginning of a conversation torment themselves with unpleasant thoughts. They constantly think about what they will talk about, whether they look good enough, what the person on the other side of the screen may be like, and such. Keep it simple. If you want to chat in a web chat – follow the link and get down to business. The less you think about it and plan it, the better it will be. Just do it!
4. Try to analyze yourself after each conversation. You can even record your conversation on video. You will see yourself like other people do, find flaws and your good traits. Consider how you might have conducted a conversation at one point or another. Do it without the thought “I should have done this like this, but I did it the other way instead”. Just take note of this thought – it will come in handy during the following conversations.
5. Put yourself into someone else’s shoes. Random video chat users are people just like you. Perhaps they are more worried than you are. And when two interlocutors at once cannot cope with their own anxiety, the conversation will certainly not work out. Deal with your anxiety and provide support for the other person. Anyway, imagine if you start chatting in a random chat with someone who is worried. He blushes, sometimes lowers his eyes, his speech is slightly confused. Would you consider such an interlocutor strange? Not at all! On the contrary, you will happily try to get him to talk and help him overcome his embarrassment. Other people think the same way. At least the majority. Mild excitement is completely normal.
6. Do not exaggerate. Many of us tend to exaggerate our own shortcomings and mistakes. For example, you stumbled slightly during a conversation or your voice trembled, but it seems as if you have completely slurred speech, which the interlocutor should laugh at. Some people wind themselves up so much that they disconnect from the interlocutor after the slightest mistake on their part. Naturally, this is nonsense. Be nice to yourself and give yourself the right to make mistakes.
7. Train your communication skills. All of the previous tips are irrelevant if you don’t try video chatting. The anxiety goes away with experience. And the more actively you meet new people, the easier each subsequent acquaintance goes. Yes, it can be difficult at first, but it’s temporary. Also, don’t forget about communication in real life with friends, acquaintances and even random people. For example, sellers, cashiers, waiters in a cafe or just passers-by. Do not hesitate to ask for help finding the address you want or for directions to the nearest bus stop. Even with a few words with a stranger, you will overcome your inner anxiety.
Nothing helps and are you still worried? Try to practice beforehand!
If, despite everything, anxiety still prevents you from video chatting, try giving yourself a little workout. For example, prepare a few questions or topics and just speak to the camera. Talk about yourself and your hobbies, try different intonations, and work on your gestures. You can record your own conversation on video, so that you can watch and draw conclusions. But this is optional. Just speaking to the camera, you practice your speaking skills and become more confident.
Simple video chatting with friends helps to adapt to the format of random video chats very well. Try to call your loved ones several times on Skype or Zoom. This will help you at least understand the specifics of video communication. Alternatively, you can use short video messages. For example, Telegram messenger has such a function. You will learn to speak more freely on camera. It’s almost the same as sending a voice message.
And the last thing for today. Stop doubting yourself! It is doubt that is the root of all the troubles of modern man. Everyone on the Internet is a human with their own shortcomings and peculiarities. And you probably do not have a single reason to consider yourself to be worse. Tune in to the positive, remember interesting life stories that you can tell, show interest in the interlocutor and remain yourself. And then you will not notice how the anxiety goes away forever, and new acquaintances on the Internet will become easy and enjoyable for you.